Just One Time
by NothingGoesAsPlanned
Summary: He still doesn't know why Logan practically threw himself at him. He can't figure out why he decided to have sex with him, even though he was sober. He doesn't know, doesn't want to think about it, and frankly, doesn't care. It was just one time, he tells himself. *Now multi-chaptered.
1. Part One

Logan's always been the responsible one.

That's just the way it works. Logan's the one who knows the consequences of a certain plan of theirs. Logan's the one who doesn't drink at parties, because he's the one who will be driving home. Logan's the one who Mrs. Knight can trust to keep things under control when she has to leave the boys alone.

So it's quite a surprise when Logan tells them he wants to drink.

They've just been invited to some party not too far from the Palm Woods. How they got the invite, well, none of them really know. Kendall just hears party and invite only and a some random dude nods at them. So he figures that small, little gesture is enough of an invite, and he tells James, Carlos, and Logan about it as soon as he can get them into the same room.

"Wait, wait, _what_?" James is the first to speak, and Kendall and Carlos cock their heads to the side dumbly. Logan crosses his arms firmly and frowns, lips turned down and eyes beginning to set into the Death Glare of Death ™ (which was named by James, hence the double "death").

"I'm drinking tonight." He repeats again, and Kendall idly wonders if his ears are working right, because since when has good little Logan Mitchell wanted to drink?

"You're joking, right?" He asks, and the brunette standing in front of him rolls his eyes.

"No, Kendall, I am not joking." He snaps, and the blonde boy holds his hands up defensively, because the last thing he needs is Logan shooting spitballs at him or jumping him.

"But dude, you _never_ drink." Carlos says, blinking at the boy in front of him like he's some sort of strange being that just dropped down from the sky. Or maybe from the apartment's ceiling.

"I'm going to this time!" Logan says, stamping his foot down like a five year old in the middle of a tantrum. Kendall can't help it. He laughs at the sight in front of him, and Logan turns towards him, eyebrow twitching in irritation and the glare on his face intensifying.

"What are you laughing at?" He snaps, stepping forward and jabbing the blonde in the chest. "This is something I want to do."

"Nothing." Kendall says, snorting. "And yeah, that's cool. But haven't you thought of who's going to drive us home? You've always been the designated driver." Kendall says this with a shrug. "But hey, I guess we'll just drive home drunk."

"We can't do that." Logan mutters, stepping away from the blonde, who now looks at him with a smug look.

"Exactly. That's why you don't get to drink tonight." He says that with an air of finality, and any protests James or Carlos had are effectively squashed. Because in their little group, which could be viewed as a pack, Kendall is the alpha male. And James and Carlos are the obedient betas. And Logan, well, he's kind of a mix of an alpha and beta. Sometimes he's so stubborn and defiant, even more than Kendall. And other times, he's more submissive and obedient than James and Carlos combined.

"How about _you_ don't drink?" Logan says, stepping forward again.

Carlos and James exchange looks, because apparently Logan's in alpha mode. And two alphas against each other is _never_ good.

"How about you just do what you're supposed to?" Kendall counters, stepping forward as well. His body is rigid, standing straight and tall. He stares down at Logan with this fire in his eyes, silently challenging the smaller boy.

Logan holds his head up, matching Kendall's heat with a flame of his own. His body is completely stiff, too, and James and Carlos both watch silently, trying to see who will give in first.

Surprisingly, it's Kendall. The blonde steps away, sighing and pinching the bridge of his nose.

"Fine." He says, and Logan arches an eyebrow. "You can drink tonight. I'll be the designated driver." He gets a pained look on his face, but it's not like Logan notices. He's too busy smirking and looking at James and Carlos in that "Ha, I got what I wanted," sort of way.

And almost simultaneously, uncomfortably feelings settle in the two boy's stomach. They look between the blonde and brunette in front of them before looking at each other, shaking their heads slightly.

They only hope Logan wasn't one of those uncontrollable drunks.

* * *

"So everyone knows the rules, right?" Logan asks as soon as they pull up in front of the house. Just because he's drinking tonight doesn't mean he's not still responsible.

"Yeah, we know. Make sure you can always see at least one of us in your line of vision, don't try to stay longer, and don't have sex with anyone." Carlos says with an eye roll. James pouts from beside him.

"I still think that last one sucks." He mumbles, and this time everyone rolls their eyes.

"No drugs, either." Logan adds, and James sighs.

"Okay _Mom_, we got it." He says, and the statement causes the shorter brunette's face to heat up.

"Alright, then." He turns to Kendall, smirking slightly. The blonde rolls his eyes and yanks the key out of the ignition.

"I know, damn it." He mutters. "No drinking." The words leave a sour taste in his mouth.

Logan gives him a satisfied smile, and they all head into the house.

The living room is filled with a large crowd of writhing bodies, bumping and grinding against each other in some kind of erotic dance. James and Carlos instantly jump into the crowd with whoops of excitement, and vanish from the other half of BTR's vision.

Kendall heads to where the drinks are, an unsure Logan trailing behind him. He fills a red plastic cup with the spiked fruit punch, handing the cup over to his companion with a smirk.

"Bottoms up." He says, and Logan tilts his head back and swallows most of the liquid. Some of it escapes from the corner of his mouth, dribbling down the side of his mouth and landing on his black shirt. He coughs, tears forming in his eyes, gagging and holding his tongue out.

"Ugh, that stuff is gross!" He complains, wiping at the corner of his mouth and giving the cup in his hand a strange look.

Kendall laughs and takes the cup from the pale boy's hand, filing it up again and handing it back, still smirking.

"Hey, you're the one who wanted to drink." Logan takes the cup again and drinks from it, much slower, and manages to get it down with a simple frown.

"Well, I've had my fun." He says, and sets the cup down on the little table. Kendall's eyes fall on the punch bowl with a longing in his eyes, but he refuses.

Tonight, he's the responsible one.

Twenty minutes later, Logan is tilting his head to the side. They've been standing in the same spot for the whole time (Kendall doesn't know why), and suddenly, Logan's eyebrows furrow and he looks kind of shocked.

"Kendall," He says quietly, and Kendall has to strain to hear what the smaller boy is saying over the pounding music.

"Yeah?"

"I think I want another one."

So Kendall pours him another one. Another twenty minutes pass. Kendall finds out that Logan is the horny drunk. He really should have expected that Logan would have gotten drunk. But honestly, he wasn't thinking. He had poured the drink mindlessly and handed it over without a second glance.

And now, Logan was whimpering and staring at Kendall with wide eyes, teary eyes.

"Please, it hurts!" He whines, and he steps closer to Kendall.

The tall blonde backs up against the table, watching as the smaller boy wraps his arms around his neck and looks at him with a pleading look in his face. He thrusts his hips forward a few times, and Kendall feels the smaller boy's erection brushing over his own crotch.

"Logan, what-" He cuts himself off, watching the boy in front of him, desperate and clinging to him like Kendall's his lifeline.

He doesn't know why Logan is on top of him, whimpering. He doesn't know why his jeans are suddenly getting tighter. He doesn't know why suddenly images of him pounding into the smaller boy is all he can see.

But he does know that they're both straight. He has Jo and Logan has Camille. He loves Jo and Logan loves Camille. He doesn't want to have sex with Logan, and Logan doesn't want to have sex with him.

Except, maybe, they aren't as straight as the thought. Yes, they both love their respective partners. But it's hard for Kendall to mistake his boner for anything else. It's hard to ignore Logan thrusting against him and whining, _begging_ him to "fuck me, Kendall,_please_,".

It's hard to imagine his best friend since childhood wanting him, wanting him in a way he's never wanted him before.

He grabs Logan's hand, drags him to the stairs. He prays that James and Carlos don't see what's going on, because _fuck,_ he really doesn't want to explain anything. He just wants Logan to shut up and stop annoying him.

At least, that's what he tells himself.

The first bedroom they walk in to is occupied. In fact, every bedroom is occupied. Kendall growls and locks them into the bathroom, flicks the light on and looks at Logan. The brunette looks at him with big, brown eyes, silently begging and pleading.

Kendall lifts him up and puts him on the counter. Their lips crash together violently, teeth scraping against skin and Logan mewls into the kiss, wrapping his legs tightly around the blonde's waist, bringing his body between his legs.

Kendall asks himself what's going on. Why does Logan want to have sex with him? Why is he allowing it to happen? He decides to use the excuse that they're drunk. They're drunk and horny, and neither knows what they're doing. They just know that they want each other, want to be connected in to the most intimate way possible.

The only thing is, Kendall isn't drunk. No, he's totally sober. Logan's the drunken one, the one who's going to get a major hangover tomorrow, and if luck is on Kendall's side, won't remember a single thing.

Logan whines, and disconnects himself from Kendall's lips. A thin line of saliva connects them, and when Logan leans away to pull his shirt off, Kendall watches the string fall onto the shorter boy's chest. He tugs at the hem of Kendall's own shirt, yanking insistently until the blonde gives in and takes the fabric off.

"I need you," Logan pants out, eyes wide and lips red. Kendall just stares, watches him for a few seconds, before his dick throbs in his pants and he remembers what he's supposed to be doing.

"Yeah, I got you," He says, and picks Logan off of the counter.

He flips him around, and the smaller boy sticks his ass out. Kendall's mouth goes dry, and he reaches around to fiddle with the boy's bottom. Once it's finally undone, he unzips the too tight jeans and slides them past hips and down to the middle of his thighs. Logan's underwear follows.

Logan is giving out little moans as Kendall's fingers brush lightly against his heated skin. Kendall fumbles around with his own pants and boxers until his dick is out and he groans at the feeling of the cool air hitting it.

He reaches around to Logan's lips, tapping against the small pout the boy has on. The little mouth opens, and Kendall nearly loses it as Logan's tongue swirls around his fingers. His mouth is so deliciously hot and warm, and _man_, he feels wrong for wondering what that mouth would feel like around his dick.

He slides his three fingers out, slipping one dripping digit into Logan's hole. The boy moans, sticking his ass out more and baring himself down onto the single finger inside of him. Kendall gasps at the warmth and tightness that surrounds him, once again imaging it all around his dick.

"Mhm, put another one." He demands, and Kendall's eyebrows raise on his forehead.

Another finger slides in, and he scissors them slightly. Little whimpers are spilling from Logan's lips, and after a few minutes he starts to thrust back against the invading fingers. Kendall adds the last finger, hooking it and brushing against that small little bump that causes Logan to slam his hands onto the counter and give the filthiest moan Kendall's heard in his life.

He can't wait anymore.

Kendall yanks his fingers out, ignoring Logan's displeased whine. He spits in his hand, rubbing it along his dick and using all his willpower not to thrust in to it. Once he's sure it's slick enough, he positions himself at Logan's entrance. He looks up into the mirror, where Logan is already staring at him.

And then he thrusts in. _Hard_.

Logan's mouth widens into a perfect "O", lips stretched and back arching. He screams in pain and pleasure, and Kendall doesn't bother to silence him. Because _fuck_, he feels goddamn amazing. And Kendall swears it's the best thing he's felt in his nineteen years of living.

"M-Move!" Logan demands, and so Kendall pulls himself out before surging back in.

He tries to go slow at first, but it's too hard. He senses Logan getting bored by the slow pace, watches the boy shift relentlessly. He pulls himself out faster, and thrusts in quicker. Logan moans in appreciation, slams his hips back to meet Kendall's.

Soon enough, Kendall's pounding into the brunette. Logan's mouth is in that same, circular shape from before. He's thrusting back against Kendall, eyes squeezed shut and screams tumbling out of his mouth.

"Kendall! Kendall!" He says, over and over. The sound makes Kendall moves faster and faster.

The head of his dick brushes against Logan's prostate, and Logan's back arches in a way that makes Kendall wince. He vaguely wonders if it could snap, but stops once he hears Logan's screams escalate.

He groans, pressing in harder and harder, squeezing his eyes closed and reveling in the feeling. He tries to not think about it being Logan, but it's impossible. It's Logan's voice screaming his name, and Logan's hole stretched wide around his dick, Logan's inner muscles squeezing around him, Logan's hips he's gripping like they're the only thing keeping him sane.

All he can recognize is Logan, and when the boy tightens hard around him and comes without Kendall even touching him, he falls off the edge and dives deep into orgasmic bliss. He pulls out slowly, collapsing against the other boy's back.

Once they finally catch their breath, Kendall opens his eyes. Logan's staring into the mirror again, looking at him with a sly little grin. And so he ruts himself against the small boy until he's hard, slides in and feels the tight heat envelope him.

The only coherent thing Kendall can think is a bitter remark about how they've just broken a rule.

* * *

There are three things Logan notices.

One: His whole body aches, especially his behind.

Two: His head hurts the most, throbbing like there's a person inside of his head, ramming against his skull with a hammer.

Three: He can't remember a single thing that happened last night.

So when Kendall comes into the room, glass of water and pain medication in his hands, and doesn't hesitate.

"Do you know what happened to me last night?" He asks quickly, and watches the green-eyed boy stiffen.

"How should I know?" He asks snappily, and Logan stares at him, mouth gaping open.

"I just…" Logan begins, voice faltering. Kendall stares at him with piercing eyes.

"Just take this. Get some rest. Don't eat anything too solid." He says briskly, turning around to leave. Logan's lips tilt down.

"You know what happened, don't you?" He asks. He watches as Kendall's hands curl into fists.

"Yeah. You broke a rule. You had sex with some guy." And then he's gone, slamming the door behind him.

Logan stays in his position on the bed, eyes wide and mouth open like a fish out of water. He pieces together the information he knows, feeling his eyes begin to burn.

He got drunk last night, had sex with some random _guy_, and cheated on Camille.

His mouth feels dry. He leans over to the bedside table, body aching and screaming in protest. He pops a tablet of medicine into his mouth and drinks some water.

He had sex with a guy.

Logan doesn't want to believe it. A girl? Now that would have been believable. He's straight, he's into girls, guys don't cut it for him. But the ache in his behind is hard to mistake for anything else.

He feels sick to his stomach. He jumps off the bed, makes his way into the bathroom and vomits into the toilet. He dry heaves when he's done, body shaking and trembling and tears threatening to fall down his cheeks.

Once he's cleaned up, fresh out of the shower and breath smelling like his favorite mint toothpaste, he heads outside. There's a limp in his walk, a limp that's pretty noticeable. He ignores James' wide-eyed look, ignores Carlos whispering to the shocked brunette sitting next to him. He slides into his usual seat at the table, staring at the empty spot in front of him. Kendall places a bowl of oatmeal in front of him.

No one says anything at first. They eat in silence, until suddenly James clears his throat.

"So Logan, how'd it feel to be the one not driving home?" He asks, a little grin on his face. Logan gives him a blank look.

"It's not like I remember." He says bitterly.

No one speaks after that. Carlos helps Kendall clear the dishes away and James heads to the pool. Logan doesn't move from his spot, eyes staring at the placemat in front of him.

* * *

Kendall wants to tell him. He _should_ tell him. But he doesn't. Because what difference would that make? They would both want to take it back. But they can't, it's already been done. They had sex last night, had _drunken_ sex last night.

Kendall scoffs at himself, and his brain reminds him that he hadn't been drunk.

He still doesn't know why Logan practically threw himself at him. He can't figure out why he decided to have sex with him, even though _he_ was sober. He doesn't know, doesn't want to think about it, and frankly, doesn't care.

It was just one time, he tells himself.

He continues to tell himself weeks later, when everything's starting to go back to normal and the party is behind them. Logan told Camille about the party, and the aftermath was not pretty. But some time later she forgave him, and then they get back together.

Kendall wishes that they hadn't, and he tells himself it's because Logan spends too much time worrying about Camille when he should be worrying about the band.

He tells himself, repeats over and over again the "It was just one time," thing while he breaks up with Jo, saying that he just doesn't feel anything anymore. She asks him if there's someone else, and he says there isn't. Only there is, but he can't admit it. _Won't_admit it.

He tells himself this, those five little words, as he watches Logan bite his lip and laugh, eyes shining. He ignores that little warmth in his heart, because it's not from Logan. He ignores the tightness in his jeans, because it's not from Logan. He ignores any feelings he gets from simply being with the other boy, because they're just friends, and there are no goddamn feelings.

That night was just one time.


	2. Part Two

Everyone notices that Kendall's been a little…_off_.

James doesn't say anything. He and Kendall always get into little fights, and honestly, he really doesn't want to start something with the blonde. So he stays silent, propping his feet up on the small coffee table in the living room and lazily flipping through the newest _Men's Fashion_ magazine.

Carlos doesn't say anything. Contrary to what most think, he's actually really good at reading the atmosphere. And right now, Kendall has this whole _talk to me and I'll punch your face in _air about him. So he slaps his trusty helmet on and goes down to the pool.

And then there's Logan. The most irritated one. He glares at Kendall like he's a dark spot on a white surface. The taller boy is totally unaware of the boy boring holes into the side of his head. He continues flipping through the television channels; as if he _isn't_ the one make everyone feeling like they're walking on eggshells around him. Unlike James and Carlos, he decides to say something. Because really, this is getting out of hand.

"Okay!" Logan says loudly, and James' eyes snap towards him, warning look in place. Logan ignores the tall brunette and stomps over to the still seated blonde on the couch, huffing. "What the _hell_ is your problem?" He demands, and Kendall only looks at him blankly.

"Huh?" He asks, and the way he says it, so calm and collected, makes Logan almost want to hit him. _Almost_.

"Why are you acting like this? You won't talk to any of us. You're almost _never_ home. And most of all, you ignore me and act like I'm not even here!" Logan says. He tries to mask the hurt in his voice, but it's too late. Kendall's already heard it.

Kendall's collected expression cracks for a mere second. He looks guilty, but then his face gets a blank expression on it.

"I'm not ignoring you." He says coolly, eyes landing on the television screen in front of him.

Logan growls and pulls the remote out of Kendall's hand, stabbing the power button. He glares at the blonde in front of him, grasping his shoulders.

"Just talk to me! I'm your best friend, damn it!"

Kendall shoots up quickly, and Logan almost loses his balance. Just as he rights himself, Kendall shoves him back. Logan nearly trips over the coffee table. James is up in seconds, standing in front of Logan like a human shield. Kendall stares at both of them angrily, and Logan notes that the taller boy is shaking with rage.

"I don't want to fucking talk about it." He snaps. "Talking about it won't do _shit_."

"How do you know? You haven't even tried it!" Logan says. James gives him a look that clearly says _shut up_ over his shoulder.

Kendall's body continues to tremble. He shakes his head, turning on his heel and stomping to the door.

"Just leave me alone." He says. Logan goes after him, but Kendall slams the door in face.

"We have been!" He screams, and he knows that Kendall's heard him.

He half expects the door to open back, for Kendall to stand in the doorway. But the door never opens again, and they don't see Kendall until dinner that night.

* * *

The next morning, they have to go to the studio early. They all cram inside their car. Logan glares at James and Carlos as they quickly hop into the back seat. He sits in the passenger seat, resisting the urge to start questioning the blonde on his left. He crosses his arms tightly and looks out the window until they arrive at Rocque Records.

Rehearsal goes as usual: Gustavo yells, everyone except Kendall jumps, Mr. X tells them they've gotten better, and Kelly tries to keep Gustavo calm.

Gustavo's in the middle of a long rant about how many things they have to fix and why won't they do what he tells them to and so on. Then he tells them that he wants to work with only two of them. He tells them that he'll take Kendall and Logan first when Kendall suddenly throws his headphones down and stomps out of the booth.

Everyone stares after him, no one saying a word. Gustavo's face goes red with anger, and his eyes land on Logan.

"Go after the dog." He grits out. Logan raises an eyebrow, looking between Gustavo, Kelly, James, and Carlos.

"No! Why can't James or Carlos do it?" He protests, throwing his hands up. Gustavo opens his mouth, probably to yell, but Kelly lays a hand on his shoulder.

"Because you'll know how to calm him down." She tells him, jerking her head towards the door.

Logan exhales loudly, slamming his headphones down.

"Fine." He seethes, exiting the booth.

He grumbles not-so-nice things about his band mate as he searches the studio for him. He finds him in the break room, a crushed water bottle in his hands.

"Gustavo wants you to come back-" He cuts himself off abruptly.

Tears are in Kendall's eyes. The blonde looks away from him when he enters, crushing the bottle even more.

"What?" He snaps. Logan opens and closes his mouth dumbly, because _wow_, he's never seen Kendall cry once in all their years of friendship.

"I just, uh, what's wrong?" Logan stammers out, hesitantly approaching the blonde.

"You asked me what my problem was yesterday." Kendall starts, turning to look at Logan. The tears aren't in his eyes anymore, and Logan wonders if he imagined them. He gives the brunette the coldest expression he's seen in his entire life. "My problem is _you_."

And then Kendall is standing, bumping his shoulder against Logan's roughly as he passes. The brown-eyed boy stays rooted in his spot, anger melting away and being replaced by shock and hurt.

He takes a shaky breath, turning around the watch the other boy's retreating back.

_What did I do…?_

* * *

Kendall knows he's being an asshole. Honestly, he _knows_. He sees the expression on James and Carlos' faces whenever he enters the room. He sees Logan's body tense, feels the intense glare directed on him. But he refuses to say anything. Because what the fuck would talking solve? Nothing, that's what.

He can't talk about this. This…this…terrible thing.

He keeps thinking about that night. Thinks about Logan's lips and Logan's hips and Logan's tight heat. He thinks about how close he was to the other boy, thinks about why he hadn't noticed his feelings before. He thinks about how he broke up with Jo, how Logan is the only person he finds himself attracted to.

He doesn't want these feelings. He's not gay. Kendall stands by that, damn it. He doesn't want to admit it to himself, admit it to anyone. But it's near impossible. Logan's everywhere, tempting him like some fucking forbidden fruit.

And he honestly just wants a break. He wants to get away, wants to forget about these feelings completely. But he can't. Logan's always in the corner of his mind, in his line of vision, in the dreams he doesn't want to have but does. And when he wakes up, a sticky patch in his boxers and his eyes landing on the body across the room, his heart actually _aches_.

Because Logan has Camille, and Kendall has no one. Because he wants Logan, but Logan doesn't want him. Because that night was just one time, and _fuck_, he wants it to be many times, over many nights and days and everything.

He loves Logan. He won't admit it, but damn it, it's true. He loves Logan like James loves Cuda and flirting and like Carlos loves corndogs and his helmet. He loves him like Logan loves anything to do with medicine…and Camille. He loves him like he thought he loved Jo, with the little butterflies and cheesy dates and all that shit.

He wants to be the one telling Logan he loves him. He wants to be the one holding Logan tight, kissing him until the smaller boy is laughing and red in the face. He wants to be the one who comforts Logan when he's upset, cheers him up when he's sad. He wants Logan all to himself, wants to be the only person Logan loves.

But that won't happen, Kendall notes with a bitter taste on the back of his tongue. Because Logan wants Camille, with her goddamn girliness.

And Kendall hates him for that.


	3. Part Three

"I don't even know what I did." Logan complains, head in Camille's lap as her fingers run gently through his hair.

"Did you ask him?" Camille asks, removing her fingers from her boyfriend's hair and gently patting his shoulder. Logan sits up and adjusts himself so that he's facing her.

"Well, he's not exactly in a pleasant mood right now." He says with a frown. Camille chews her lips in thought.

"How long has he been acting like this?" She asks. Logan furrows his eyebrows.

"A couple months, I think. Since that party." He says, and they both tense.

"Oh." Camille says, voice hard. And Logan doesn't need to be a mind reader to know she's thinking about how Logan slept with someone that day. A _guy_ to be exact.

"I don't get it though. Nothing happened between us that would make him act like this." Logan says, sighing. Camille shrugs, getting off of the couch and heading into the kitchen.

"Maybe he's uncomfortable with the fact that you slept with a boy." She says. He can tell she's trying to be casual about it, but he can hear the edge in her voice.

Logan raises an eyebrow.

"Are you?" He asks, because he's one-hundred percent sure she's no longer talking about Kendall.

"Honestly? Yeah, I am. I mean, you slept with a _boy_, Logan. That's so wrong." She says, shaking her head.

Logan feels a tightness in his chest.

"I was drunk. And there's nothing wrong with a guy sleeping with another guy. Unless one of them in a relationship. And you _know_ I didn't do it on purpose. I mean, I don't even remember that night." He says.

Camille shakes her head again.

"Whatever, Logan. It's so _wrong_. Two men can't have a baby. What's the point of them being together?"

The tightness in Logan's chest increases until he feels like he's going to choke.

"There's nothing wrong with it." Logan insists, and Camille fixes him with a piercing gaze.

"Why are you getting so defensive?" She demands. "Are _you_ gay? It would make sense. You did sleep with a guy."

Logan's jaw drops.

"That's not fair!" He cries. "I was drunk, for fuck's sake! I'm getting defensive because what you're saying is so ridiculous. Some women can't have babies. Because they don't have the ability to reproduce, does that mean they aren't able to find love?" He goes on.

Camille narrows her eyes at him.

"Don't turn this around on me." She warns him. "It's not my fault you're messed up."

Logan steps back like he's been slapped. Camille gives him this look, this cold, cruel _look_. It makes Logan want to vomit. He takes another step backwards before he changes directions and leaves her apartment without another word.

The tightness in his chest remains. He walks towards 2J, heart pounding in his ears. Once he's inside, his eyes run over the apartment. They land on the couch, where Kendall is playing an Xbox game by himself. Logan doesn't bother looking at the television to see what game it is. He walks until he's right by Kendall's side, wringing his hands nervously.

"Oh, it's you." Kendall says, finally looking up at him. He looks away quickly, eyes focusing on the screen. His fingers jab at the buttons, and he's cursing under his breath.

"Kendall," Logan begins, and the blonde's fingers don't stop their movement. "Who was the guy I slept with that night?"

And then, Kendall stops. He looks at Logan, eyes wide.

"Why do you want to know?" He asks.

Logan fiddles with his fingers.

"Camille and I got into an argument. And she asked me if I was gay, since I slept with that guy and all." He continues quietly. "She thought that you were mad at me because-"

"I'm not." Kendall interrupts. He leans back against the couch.

Logan nods, swallowing. He makes a mental note to ask why exactly the blonde was mad at him later.

"And, uh, I don't know if I am. I mean, I guess I might be. I've never thought about it." Kendall raises an eyebrow, so Logan clears his throat and continues. "Might be…gay."

Kendall sighs, rubbing his temple.

"Why do you need to know who that guy was? You want to sleep with him again? Maybe soberly this time?"

Logan's face turns bright red.

"N-No! I mean, I just thought that he could help me figure out if I am since he's probably gay-"

"How the fuck do you know that?" Kendall is up in seconds, eyes narrowed. "How the _fuck_ do you know he's gay? You don't know shit about him!"

Logan steps back from the angered blonde in shock.

"I just figured-"

"Maybe he's just confused. Maybe he did it to shut you up. Maybe he doesn't want the fucking feelings he has for you. Maybe you talking to him is making him go insane."

"Kendall." Logan says, eyes wide with fear. The blonde in front of him is shaking, jaw clenched and eyes narrowed dangerously. "What are you talking about?"

Kendall's hand clenches into a fist.

"The guy you slept with is right in front of you." He says. He won't look at Logan. He leaves in seconds, and Logan swears he's never seen the green-eyed boy move so fast.

The only thing Logan can hear is the sound of the game running and Kendall's words repeating in his head.

And then, it finally dawns on him.

He slept with Kendall. _Kendall_ is the guy he wanted to talk to.

Logan wonders why he didn't realize it earlier. Because damn it, it was obvious. The next morning, Kendall didn't want to answer any of Logan's questions about the previous night. When he finally answered, all he said was that it was a random guy. He avoided Logan like he was the plague, and it finally made sense. Everything made _so much fucking sense_.

His lips part, and he tries to form words. He pretends Kendall's still in front of him, tries to piece together a coherent sentence. But he can't. His thoughts run into each other, breaking off and branching into new ones. His head aches and he has to sit down to prevent himself from falling to the ground.

Kendall has _feelings_ for him. Feelings that go way beyond the "Hey you're best friend," feelings. Feelings that are more like "Hey I fucked you and now I think I have feelings for you,".

For once in his life, Logan has no idea what to say.


	4. Part Four

Kendall screams in frustration, gripping his hair in his hands and yanking at the golden strands. He's on the ground, little pieces of gravel digging into his knees and angry tears forming in his eyes.

He _told_ Logan. He fucking _told him_. He messed everything up. He knows Logan won't want to be near him, won't want to even look at him. Because he can't keep his fucking emotions in check, Logan is going to _hate_ him.

He should have told him from the start. Should have pulled the smaller boy aside, maybe when they were alone at the studio or in the apartment, somewhere where Logan could storm out instead of him storming out because what Logan was feeling would be a hell of a lot worse than what Kendall was feeling right now. Then he could have said everything, started from when Logan started drinking and finishing with the bathroom sex. Then Logan could scream at him, give him a betrayed expression and leave, maybe slap him if he wanted to.

_That_ would have been the right thing to do. But Kendall's a coward, a coward that lets his stupid fear get in the way. If Logan hates him, it's no one's fault but his own. He loosens his grip on his hair and takes heavy breaths.

He stares out from the roof. The sky's getting darker, and the little city lights are bright, obnoxiously bright against the darkness. It used to make Kendall happy, used to make him feel like he was back in Minnesota, lying on his bed and peering out at the stars. But today it just reminds him that he's in L.A., where he's just ruined his friendship with Logan Mitchell.

"Hey," He hears a timid voice say, and he forces himself to stop shaking. He turns around, blinking until he can make out the faint shape of a body.

"Hey," He responds, voice gruff.

Quiet footsteps approach him, and it takes all he has not to scoot away when Logan drops himself next to him. They sit in tense silence, Logan looking at Kendall and Kendall pretending to be entranced by the city lights.

"I want to talk." Logan says, and Kendall finally looks at him. The brunette singer looks completely serious, not an ounce of hate in his eyes.

Kendall figures it okay, because he wants to talk too.

"Yeah," He says, stretching his legs out.

Logan shifts next to him, twiddling his thumbs and chewing his lip. He finally opens his mouth, eyebrows furrowed slightly.

"Why didn't you tell me?" He asks, sounding so hurt and betrayed that Kendall feels a twinge of guilt flood through him.

"What do you mean?" He asks, trying to play dumb, trying to act like he has _no idea_ what Logan is talking about. But the smaller boy already knows this, so he gives Kendall his infamous glare and the blonde cracks. "We would have wanted to take it back-"

"Would we?" Logan asks, and Kendall stops, shocked by the question. "What if we wanted it?"

"You were drunk." The green-eyed boy says, shaking his head slightly.

"And you weren't." Logan counters. "You wanted me. You didn't do it to shut me up or anything. You did it because you wanted me. You _still_ want me."

Kendall sucks in a deep breath, because Logan's hit the nail on the head.

"You're just scared, right? Scared of how I'll react." Logan pauses, seeming to be searching for the words he wants to say. "I've thought about it."

Kendall groans, standing up and running his hands through his hair.

"God damn it Logan." He says, voice rough. "There was nothing to think about. You were drunk and horny. I was the closet person to you."

"That's not it!" Logan cries, standing up as well. "I love you! I thought about it! About everything! And damn it, I love you!"

Kendall falls silent. He approaches the smaller boy. Swallowing roughly, he stares at the boy in front of him.

"Don't say that." He whispers harshly. "You don't mean it."

Logan reaches up, gripping his face between his hands, standing slightly on his tiptoes.

"I mean it." He says, and Kendall squeezes his eyes shut. "I love you, Kendall."

It feels like a dream. A cruel fucking _dream_. But it's not, and the feeling of Logan's lips against his own is too real to imagine. They break away too quickly for either of their likes, and Kendall leans down and brushes his lips against Logan's, once, twice, three times before pulling away completely.

"What about Camille?" He asks, chest clenching at the mention of her name. Logan furrows his eyebrows.

"I'm pretty sure she broke up with me." He says, and Kendall feels relieved.

"I was in denial, you know." The blonde says, thumbs pushing Logan's shirt up and rubbing tiny circles into the smooth skin of his hip. "I kept telling myself I felt nothing for you, because that time was just once."

"It wasn't." Logan says simply, and Kendall feels a wave of arousal flush over him.

"Is that an invite?" He asks, and Logan only smirks at him. He steps away from the taller boy, hands falling to his sides.

"Maybe." He says, throwing in a flirtatious wink. Then he suddenly straightens, expression going serious. "I still want to know why you were upset with me."

Kendall sighs, pinching the bridge of his nose.

"It's stupid," He begins, and Logan only shrugs. "I wanted to stop thinking about you the whole time. I didn't want to have feelings for you. And you were with Camille, which didn't exactly help me. I was being a dick about it." He says, and Logan crosses his arms.

"You were." He agrees, and Kendall doesn't say anything. "But…I think I would have done the same thing. I would have been scared to tell you too."

"I thought I would ruin our friendship. And you didn't remember anything, so I kind of used that to my advantage." Kendall confesses. He chews his lip. "I'm really sorry, Logan. You didn't deserve all that. I should have just told you."

Logan shakes his head, smiling the slightest bit.

"It's okay, Kendall." He says, and when he kisses Kendall again the taller boy believes it one hundred percent.


	5. Part Five

"I think we're okay now." Kendall says, actually smiling. Jo smiles back kindly at him.

"That's great." She says, glad to see the blonde boy so happy. He'd been so miserable lately.

"Isn't it?" Kendall gives her that blinding grin. "You're okay with it, right?"

Jo rolls her eyes, playfully shoving him.

"I was the one who said to just tell him from the beginning." She says. "But maybe it was better this way."

Kendall nods, looking out at the pool in front of them. He grins at Logan, who smiles at him in the midst of his water fight with Carlos.

"I don't want to mess up with Logan again. Treating him the way I did really hurt him." He says. Jo smiles at him again, laying a comforting hand on his shoulder.

"He forgives you. You just have to move past that and focus on now. It's alright, Kendall." He tells him.

Kendall nods slowly.

"Yeah, you're right." He says. He gets up slowly, jerking his thumb towards where Logan is. "I think I'm going to hang out with the guys a bit. Catch you later?"

Jo nods, nodding towards them.

"Go," She says, and Kendall beams at her before heading over to where the others are. Logan pushes himself out of the pool, and once he's up Kendall pulls him towards him and presses his lips to the brunette's.

Jo watches silently, grin threatening to split her cheeks.

* * *

Camille's over him. Still hurt, but over him. Because really, what _could_ she do? Logan had moved on, and she would have to move on too.

She approaches him when Kendall and James and Carlos go upstairs to play video games and Logan decides to hang out a bit longer, dipping his feet into the water and kicking them back and forth, back and forth. Camille watches the movement of her ex-boyfriend's legs before finally saying something.

"Hey." It's casual; they can't get in an argument about it.

"Hey." Logan responds, and a feeling of hope begins to spread through her. "What's up?" He goes on, and Camille feels a bit more confident.

"I'm sorry." She apologizes, twisting her fingers. "I shouldn't have acted the way I did. It was totally uncalled for and I shouldn't have done it."

Logan shrugs, and Camille just about falls to the floor with shock when he smiles at her.

"It's fine." He says easily, still smiling. Camille stares at the dimples on his cheeks. "At first I was kind of mad at you, but I got over it. You were just upset. I understand that."

Camille sighs in relief, smiling softly at the brunette boy still seating on the edge of the pool.

"I feel better now that I've apologized." She admits, and Logan chuckles.

"Yeah," He says. He stands up, holding his hand out to her. "We good?" He asks.

Camille slaps his hand away and pulls him into a bone crushing hug.

"I support you." The words make her feel odd, but she knows there's true. Logan laughs quietly.

"Thanks Camille." He says, and she knows that everything's okay now.

* * *

"So, everything's alright now." Logan says, looping his arms around Kendall's neck. The blonde hums, hands resting lightly on Logan's hips.

"Yep. I think everything's back to normal." Kendall says, grinning.

Logan nods, smiling and pressing a kiss underneath Kendall's jaw.

"Yeah. And you know, I think this calls for a celebration." He says suggestively, tongue poking out past plush lips to lick at his boyfriend's jaw.

Kendall wracks his brain for a response, trying not to lose himself at the feeling of Logan's went tongue touching him.

"O-oh, yeah?" He manages to stutter out, gripping Logan's hips tighter. Logan chuckles lowly, tightening his arms around the blonde's neck.

"It involves you, me, and a bed."

Kendall swears he's never moved so fast in his life. He reaches up to his neck and grabs hold of one of Logan's wrists before tugging the smaller boy in the direction of their bedroom. Once the door and shut and locked behind them, he pins his boyfriend against it.

"You have no idea how crazy you make me," He growls, smashing his lips against the other's. He pats the side of Logan's thighs, and the shorter boy jumps up. Kendall wraps his legs around his waist and holds the boy against the door.

"I think I have an idea." Logan says, gasping and throwing his head back when Kendall starts to thrust against him.

The blonde quickly sets a fast past, thrusting hard against Logan and causing them both to exclaim in pleasure.

"Bed, now," Logan manages to say, his head swimming with the pleasure he's currently receiving.

Kendall walks them over to the bed, dropping Logan down before spreading the brunette's legs and crawling in between them. He reaches one hand out to fumble around with the nightstand drawer, producing a bottle of lubricant.

He deposits the bottle onto the bed before sitting up, yanking his shirt over his head. Logan leans up on his elbows, his eyes glued to his boyfriend's body. He licks his dry lips, sitting up more and taking his own shirt off. Kendall smirks at him, pushing him down onto the bed and kissing down his jaw until he reaches his neck. He sucks at the brunette's skin, causing Logan to arch his body closer to the blonde.

"Kendall," He moans. Kendall groans at the sound of his name and sucks harder at the skin between his lips, only pulling away when there's a bright red mark on the pale flesh.

"Mine." He growls, hands going to Logan's jeans. The smaller boy lifts his hips up, giving Kendall a small smile.

"Yours." He agrees, and allows the taller boy to slide the fabric down his legs. Once he's finished, Kendall gets off of the bed and stands back a little, admiring the sight of Logan's body, because _damn,_ he's fucking gorgeous.

Once he's free of his pants and underwear, Logan sits up and begins unbuttoning the blonde's pants. Kendall hums in approval, so Logan slides the other's underwear down too. He swallows thickly when Kendall's rather impressive arousal comes only inches from his face.

"I really wish I remembered this." He says wistfully before completely enveloping the blonde in his mouth.

Kendall shouts in pleasure, hands going into Logan's hair, tightening the dark strands around his fingers.

"Fucking hell Logan," He grunts, thrusting into the boy's incredibly hot mouth. Logan looks up at him with innocent brown eyes, causing the blonde to thrust faster into that delicious heat.

Just when he feels the heat begin to pool in his belly, Logan pulls off of him. A string of saliva connects his lips and Kendall's dick, and the blonde moans at sight. Logan swipes at his lips, breaking the connection.

Kendall gets back onto the bed, hands running over Logan's body. He reaches for the bottle of lube, but Logan slaps his hands away.

"I want to do it." He says, and Kendall's mouth goes completely dry. He nods dumbly, sitting back and watching at Logan grabs the small bottle.

He pops the cap open, drizzling the clear substance onto his fingers. He snaps it shut and throws it back onto the bed before leaning back, spreading his legs wide. Kendall watches soundlessly, his eyes glued to the boy in front of him.

Logan circles his finger around his entrance before sliding it in, a small sound of pain escaping his throat. Kendall swallows past the lump in his throat, resisting the urge to touch the boy in front of him. Logan begins to move his finger in and out, and Kendall moans at the sight. His dick throbs, so he grabs it and begins to pump it lazily.

Soon, Logan begins to moan quietly. Another finger slides in, and Kendall watches hungrily as the boy's legs spread wider and he begins to thrust his fingers faster and faster.

"Oh, god, Kendall!" He moans loudly, fingers picking up speed. Kendall strokes himself faster, completely entranced by the sight of Logan fingering himself.

Logan finds his prostrate, and presses his fingers hard against it. His back arches, and he nearly screams in pleasure. He begins to scissor his fingers, ignoring the slight twinges of pain.

"How many fingers did you put in?" He huffs out, eyes locking onto his boyfriend. Kendall gapes at him for a moment before shaking his head.

"Three," He finally answers, so Logan slides another finger it.

The slight pain increases, so Logan presses harder against his prostate. He pants, body shaking. He feels a coil in his stomach begin to form, feels his coiling tighter and tighter until it's almost about to snap. He pulls his fingers out quickly, breathing heavily.

"Now," He moans, feeling himself ache in need. "Do it now."

Kendall doesn't need to be told twice. He fumbles around the bed before finally locating the lube, hastily squirting a good amount into his hand. He pumps himself a few times, twisting his wrist and making sure he's even coated. Then he positions himself at Logan's entrance, take a few steadying breaths, because honestly, he never thought this would happen again.

Then he's sliding in, eyes rolling to the back of his head as Logan's tight heat encases him. He breathes heavily through his nose, his mind constantly screaming a mantra of _breathe, you idiot!_ He waits until Logan locks his legs around his waist and gives him a small, gently smile.

The first few thrusts are agonizingly slowly. Logan moans softly into his throat, whispering _I'm not going to break, you know,_ so Kendall begins to move faster. He moves faster, and harder, and faster until Logan's legs are gripping him so tightly and he can feel his boyfriend's erection brushing against his stomach every time he surges in.

"Oh god," Logan moans loudly, thrusting up against Kendall. "Oh, god, Kendall!"

Kendall grunts and shoves his fact between Logan's neck and shoulder, panting heavily into the boy's neck.

"Fuck, Logan!" He shouts when he feels the boy begin to tighten around him.

The brunette only moans louder, sliding his arms around Kendall's neck and holding tight, dropping his legs from the blonde's waist and spreading them wide.

"So close," He whimpers, and Kendall can only breathe harder against his neck. He knows he isn't going to last much longer, and from the sound of Logan's moans, the shorter boy isn't going to either.

He grips his boyfriend's erection in his hand, pumping his jerkily at a rhythm different from his harsh throats. Logan practically screams into his ear, and it only takes a few slowly jerks until Logan's coming hard into Kendall's fist. The blonde gives the hardest thrust of all, holding his hips firmly against Logan's and comes hard into his sensitive body.

Logan gives a small, displeased whine when Kendall slides out. The blonde singer flops next to the other, still struggling to regain his breathing.

"Man," Logan starts, turning to look at his boyfriend. "I _really_ wish I remembered that night now." He says, and Kendall manages to chuckle softly.

He leans over, pressing a kiss to Logan's temple.

"I love you," He says, and the words feel so right on his tongue. Logan grins and kisses him back, snuggling into the blonde's side. Kendall stares at the ceiling, a feeling of content washing over him. Logan dozes off next to him, so he closes his eyes too.

When sleep finally begins to take a hold of him, Kendall thinks about how wonderful it is to know that night wasn't just one time.


End file.
